5:16 p.m. - 2006-10-08
pit of despair
After drinks last night with a girlfriend, I took a long drive down Potranco Road to see what was past our house.
Not much, and it made for a nice drive. The weather is finally cooling off, so I was able to fly with with windows down, breeze flipping my hair and caressing my face the way a would-be lover might.
Her husband is the one that recommended E for the jobout here. I told her about everything that is going on, and she says she will never be able to look at E the same way again. I asked her if E ever mentioned to her husband anything he might be doing, and she said no but she will ask some probing questions.
I'd like to find just one person that says I'm being crazy, it's just a bunch of coincidences and he'd never cheat on me. But so far, everyone agrees, and the feeling of dread grows more and more as I sink into this pit of despair.
I can fit the box of Danny's baby memorabilia and the kitty in my car, maybe I should just chalk up my grandpa's dressers and everything else sentimental that I brought with me as a loss. If I don't have to have a hitch put on my car and if I don't have to rent a trailer, then it should only take about $500 to get home.
I will never trust anybody again. My open heart is officially closed for business, and I no longer believe in fairy tales or in love.
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